rockydrago

Its time for the First annual Billy Zabka awards! This awards the achievement in being a major league asshole!

The award is of course named after actor Billy Zabka,

Billy was one of films greatest asshole, if not the greatest. He was a jerk in “Karate Kid”, “Just one of the Guys” and “Back to School”. He also played the boyfriend of Chevy Chase’s daughter in “European Vacation’ and of course he cheated on her when she was on vacation. Nobody played a bigger asshole or swept the leg better than Zabka!

This year the award goes to another great in asshole achievement: Frank Vincent.

There was a good joke on “American Dad” a few weeks ago. The daughter was a sleeper agent that would only activate when a certain phrase was spoken, turning her into a killing machine. It was important that this phrase would never be said, so that made it something no one would ever say “I am getting tired of this orgasm”.

While watching ‘No Country For Old Men” I thought of another phrase that has likely never been said “I’m a Josh Brolin fan”. Josh Brolin played the older brother is “Goonies” and then did about 15 years of crappy TV and movies, and TV movies. But now after “No Country…“ ,“Grindhouse” and his role as a “special” FBI investigator in “American Gangster”. Brolin, it turns out, is a pretty good actor. And it makes up for all the crummy TV movies he did, plus the fact that his dad is married to Barbra Streisand (gross).

“No Country..” is funny, violent and has probably the best movie bad guy I have ever seen. Yes even better than Darth Vader and every authority figure in the Dirty Harry movies combined “YOUR TOO RECKLESS CALLAHAN!”.
This hair cut just screams evil!

Grade: A +-ish.

Like spaghetti and meatballs, cake and ice cream or beer and anything. Sometimes when things are combined they make something so great, so fantastic that words fail to describe it.

In this case it’s the movie remake of one of my favorite movies with one of my favorite actors. And if you are thinking “Surely he isn’t suggesting that Sylvester Stallone will star in the remake of “Death Wish”!

Oh indeed I am, Sly is in talks of staring and directing the remake of “Death Wish”.

This marriage of Charles Bronson and Sly Stallone could only create one thing, awesomeness. And if it were possible for these two to have a child, it would look like this:

This eye of the tiger theory doesn’t just exist in the Rocky universe. It can also describe others who have lost their career motivation.

Here is Will’s Eye of the Tiger list:

1) Tim Allen.
Many people know the tool mans story, how he sold drugs and spent some time in prison. When he got out of jail he was determined to make something out of himself. He toured comedy clubs tirelessly, until finally receiving his own sitcom and eventual stardom. But what happens to a man after he has achieved what he was striving for? Wild Hogs, Santa Clause 3, and The Shaggy Dog is what. He no longer has the incentive to make good movies. Why would he? Even if they flop, he’s still a millionaire and he still gets paid, so where is the motivation? Exactly.

2) Charles Bronson:
Now this is a classic example, Charles grew up a hard life in a small coal mining town in western Pennsylvania. After his service in WWII he took up acting, because he was told you could make a good living in Hollywood. And eventually he did, even becoming one of the highest paid actors in the 70’s. But what happened to the son of a coal miner once he become a success beyond his wildest dreams? He stopped caring, (there is a reason he made 5 Death Wish films). Because they paid him good money and he liked to work. He just didn’t care about the quality of his films any longer.

3)Francis Ford Coppola & John Landis: 
I don’t know their stories as well but I do know that Coppola made the Godfather movies and “Apocolypse Now”, then made “Jack”. Yeah the Robin Williams movie where he is a grown man at the age of 10. Not that “Jack” is that awful of a movie, but dude you made the “Godfather”.
And Landis made “Animal House”, “The Blues Brothers” and, “Trading Places”. But since then has made “The Stupids” “Beverly Hills Cop III” and, “Blues Brothers 2000”. I don’t know what happened to him but he has obviously stopped giving a shit.

What I hated so much about Rocky V is how, once retired Rocky was a nobody again. Like people forget about Rocky 10 seconds after he left the ring. People love former boxing champions! I cant imagine Joe Frasier not getting the best table at any restaurant in Philly, and more likely than not for free. If you need more evidence, next time you go to a Pistons game look for some commotion after tip-off. Look for a middle-aged black man, fashionably late to the game, heading to his seat up front, dressed in his finest. Having his picture taken and signing whatever’s availably, its Tommy “Hit Man” Hearns. Kid Rock and Bob Seger come in the back to avoid the commotion, but Tommy loves it. I first noticed it when there was applause during a timeout, Tommy was walking through the crowd to his seat. People love boxing heroes.

In one of the first scenes of “Rocky Balboa” the champ goes to visit his son at work. * As a side not, his son Robert works in the ugliest building I have even seen. I visited it when I was in Philly..its ugly* Anyway when Rocky tries to talk to his son, he is bombarded with picture and autograph requests. And the occasional “hey champ” from passersby. Rocky also runs a restaurant, for anyone who wants good food and a chance to talk to the former champ, much like Jack Dempsey had in New York.

I really liked this movie, it was a good end to the series. It wasn’t my favorite, but it was how the “Rocky” movies were supposed to end. It wasn’t about Rocky winning it was showing how Rock could go the distance. Showing that he wasn’t just another bum from the neighborhood.

Grade: A-ish.

I must admit that I am strange. There is a new show coming this fall called “Chuck”, it looks bad but I am contractually obligated to watch it. Because it co-stars Adam Baldwin. And before I go any further, NO he is not one of “those” Baldwin’s.